Girls! What are you doing?

Girls, frustrate me. Dont get me wrong, I love being a woman. Infact, I am one of those proud women. You know, the ones that love their gender, and the history of the struggle. {Yeah I totally took some women's studies papers at university...and what?} I have had a few wake up calls recently as far as my 'friends' are concerned. Which, has been difficult for me to swallow {Made a little easier with a swig of one man who will never let me down, Jack Daniels} There is so much cattiness going around. Its a real shame because some of the girls in question, are really lovely people when they want to be, but their actions in recent times have made me question their integrity and our friendship. Which is really hard for me to say, because I really do try to see the best in everyone. {I guess that could be a fault of mine perhaps?} I guess I have a habit of trusting people too easily. For a long time, I kept walls up, and didnt let people close to me, slowly, I have let people in, let the guard down, and then things like this current situation go on and it makes me revert back to being closed off. And I dont want to come across as a shut book, but when I get hurt I guess a coping mechanism is to shut people out of my life, that way, if I get hurt I can really only blame myself. So, as much as I dont want to do it, I have re-evaluated the people that are in my life {for about the hundreth time} and maybe this time, I will get it right.

I dont understand why people {especially girls} have to bring each other down. Or why girls have to go around talking about other girls behind their backs, spreading untrue and hurtful rumors, or causing trouble between different people. Cant we just band together as Women, and focus on the important stuff? I have come to realise lately that I have high standards of people. Not in a bad way, but I expect them to respect me, and others, and that there are just some unwritten rules that people dont cross. Maybe Im in the minority here, but there are rules, about friendship, love, and well, being a good person. right? I was talking to a good friend of mine about this today, and she made such a good point when she said "Guys are hard enough to deal with, us girls have to stick together" I couldnt agree more. Especially within the sisterhood of women. I mean, I am not trying to get all feminist on you here. But ladies! We should be banding together, fighting for the same things, not with each other, over silly things, especially not over boys. I know that things cant all be peachy keen all the time, but seriously there is so much unnecesary bullshit that goes on and im so fed up. Who cares what she is wearing. Or what size jeans she fits into. Who cares who she is sleeping with. Or Who she cheated on her boyfriend with. STOP BEING NASTY! and more important STOP SPREADING RUMORS! Rumors are such dangerously out of control things, that really have the potential to harm people. Just remember that your words actually have a lot more power than you think, I have to remind myself of this alot, but its so important. Especially when it turns into a 'she said' vs. 'she said' thing between friends. there is just so much mess!

I think the worst thing about this whole situation, is that the things that went on are not even really a big deal. But, it is made into a big deal because of the lying and the cheating and the backstabbing that has surrounded the whole thing, and the personal attack on my character. I just wish people could grow up a little bit. I really thought that all this had been left behind in High School and yet it seems to be even worse now that im meant to be an 'adult' {whatever that means}. Gah! Im sorry for the rant, to be honest im not even sure this makes sense. Ill be back in few days with something more positive I hope. In the mean time... can you all just play nice? Please!